There has been some fervent debate surrounding Luisa Zissman, star of The Apprentice, because she posted pictures of herself sunning on holiday with friends on Instagram after leaving 11 week old and 6 year old daughters at home. The photos sparked some pretty awful judgements from mothers who deemed it absolutely despicable that she would even consider leaving her children to go on a holiday with her friends, especially as one of her children is still so young.
I don’t know if this is a worldwide pandemic or just where I live… but I have to say that I have some across two complete polar opposites of opinion and judgement of mothers with children; or just children too actually. I feel like I either get old women cooing over my little man or cantankerous men moaning behind me, whilst I struggle to get the pram down a set of steps, about “…all these women with pushchairs…” Is it that they have forgotten that they were children too once upon a time?
I have to admit that this week has seen me quite emotional and therefore there are probably far… far more things I should have let go than I have done. I definitely feel like having at least the intention to let things go more and be mindful that if I don let more things go then in turn I will probably be blessed with a less stressful mind. Mamas are expected to deal with so much stress and just put a loving sweet smile on our faces; god forbid we act frazzled and exhausted!
So it has taken me a while to figure this out; this whole friendships after childbirth thing. I think I just always assumed that nothing would (or should) change with my circle of friends after I brought my little man into the world. I was wrong. It is a sad truth (bear with me… it gets better I promise!) that some people struggle to A. be around pregnant women and B. maintain friendships with women after they have children as they become ‘mothers’ and therefore cannot possibly go on nights out or have fun of any kind right?
I posted a while back about my epiphany to achieving serenity as a busy rockin’ mama and how I have started to adopt ‘let it go’ moments throughout my days to ease the building pressure that can erupt from the stresses of everyday life. Lets face it, we mamas are a busy bunch and if we can just take a breath, relax and ‘let it go’ from time to time I think it would ease our mental suffering! I have decided to share a few of my ‘let it go’ moments each week that have ended up becoming points of laughter instead the bubbling of a vocal volcano that could erupt at any given point!
As I have mentioned in previous *Musings* I have been known to become the occasional stress head. This was not always the case. Pre-Mamahood I was known to anyone who knew me as the ‘happy go lucky’ ‘hippy’ one; after I brought my little prince into the world everything that wouldn’t have bothered me previously suddenly seemed to be more of an annoyance to me.
I don’t know about you but I have found that after bringing my little man into the world I can become far more easily riled than my pre-baby, happy-go-lucky self. I have put this down to simply having more on my plate, or putting more on my plate, but are we making far more work for ourselves as mothers and creating unnecessary stress by placing the ideals of ourselves far too high?
Do we need to learn to occasionally ‘let go’?
I’ve always loved writing and have felt passionately about my parenting beliefs… but starting Rock and Roses Mama blog was not on my immediate agenda until very recently.
Being a Gemini, I have often struggled with the varying sides of my eclectic personality; becoming a mama was no different and in fact possibly heightened this constant feeling of being torn between two polar opposite personas. I was always a ‘good girl’ who excelled academically and socially but found a constant need to be