So last week Clara from Utterly Feral shared ‘The worst things about planning a wedding’ and although don’t get us wrong we are psyched for our amazing days… there are some common negative vibes us brides to be feel that we can share and support each other with. As some of you may know, yesterday marked one week precisely until our wedding day. Now as well as being incredibly excited I am also suffering with the common ‘wedding jitters’; I’m not panicking about the whole ‘being married’ thing, more an array of wedding related worries that are common to most and I am listing them for you today to put you at ease that you are not alone! IWA: Imminent Wedding Anxiety (yes… that is a thing… that I may have just made up… but I like it) is brides natural state of mind when you are facing just one week until the day that you have been planning for potentially years.
Where has the time gone?
Everyone tells you when you first get engaged ‘oh it’ll go so quickly’; to a certain extent this is true… but there is a certain lull in the middle. When you first get engaged you start getting super excited and start panning everything, then there is a strange lull that doesn’t go quickly at all and you feel that you have ages to get things done.
After this lull however, reality strikes and suddenly you have no time at all! There’s no middle ground it seems… theres the long lull, your hen do, and then a seeming sudden rush of time to get things done!
Undoubtedly panic strikes when you realise it only a few months to go… then weeks… then days…
The key to this essentially is to push through the lull and keep getting things organised and crafting all of the little decorative elements and finishing touches before that final panicked rush strikes.
This may seem like an odd one but I am one of those people that can always tell when my mind is trying to tell me I am anxious or stressed about something that I am not realising as I will have very realistic and sometimes scary dreams.
When I was pregnant I had dreams like horror movies and read it was a completely normal pregnancy symptom due to the hormone changes and underlying worries.
So a few nights last week I had dreams about previous partners and their predominant and defining personality traits. I have read about this and it is your minds way of silently letting go of the past and letting yourself move forward into your new chapter. I think it is also a way of exploring why previous relationships did not work and therefore why this one is the one.
Letting go of the control
If you are anything like me, Brides like to know whats going on and will make sure every detail is planned out to precision. I personally have hand crafted everything for the wedding myself; in an attempt to conserve our funds and also because I know that way everything will be exactly how I want it to look. You can read all about my handmade wedding and see the gorgeous bouquets, button holes and invitations I have made in my previous Bloggy Bride post here.
When that big day arrives, you are forced to relinquish a portion of that control and simply turn up and hope that everything is going to plan!
During the day the venue have asked my to allocate one person to be their ‘go to’ if there are and problems as they wouldn’t want to disturb or upset me or the groom; I love this idea however it does mean that I am trusting someone to make those quick decisions for me.
The last thing that has been taken out of my control is after the reception; My mother decided that she and her husband would book a lil ‘mini-moon’ for me and the Mr. I am extremely grateful and super excited yet slightly anxious as to where we will be going!
All eyes on you
This is probably my biggest fear of the day; walking down the aisle. I mean I have never been one for public speaking or singing karaoke or anything that draws any sort of sole attention to myself from a crowd of people, so waling into a room with approximately 80 eyes staring directly at me… whilst their owners are standing… is not my idea of a fun time.
I am also walking down the aisle with the little dude so this could all go terribly wrong!
I have been told to ‘enjoy the moment’ and ‘own it’ and ‘you’ll be so fixed on Robb you won’t notice’ but Im pretty damn sure I WILL notice the fact that a sea of people are stood up looking at me. Im hoping it won’t be as horrifying as Im imaging it to be!
Im also very aware that I have to speak with everyone looking at me… Im hoping it will be ok and that I won’t be a crying and panicked mess! I want so much to enjoy it all and take it all in as I know it will be over so quickly so I am staying positive and going to try focussing on my amazing man in the hope that I will indeed (as everyone has suggested) become in a little bubble.
Am I forgetting something?
I think this is extremely common wth anything that you are planning to be honest, especially if you seem up together. I have pretty much sorted all that I can at this stage, there are a few things I can’t do just yet like the chocolate favours (My amazing Momma tribe stunner Carly Stirling and her little Rebel are helping me turn my kitchen into a chocolatier tomorrow!) but everything else is done and packed into bags ready to go to the venue on Friday for us to set up.
Im sure there is always one thing that people forget and Im prepared for that, but you can shake that niggling feeling that maybe everything is going a little too well and something major will crop up that you haven’t yet remembered.
Have you experienced any of these common symptoms of IWA: Imminent Wedding Anxiety? Did you experience any others?