I work most weekends, which does kinda suck at times but it does also mean that my little man gets some quality Daddy time which he does really love. I have always been of the opinion that it is essential for any child to have positive role models of both genders, whoever they may be; my little man is lucky enough to have so so many of those surrounding him… but no male role model quite like my rock god Mr. He will always be Daddy cool as he takes Jude to places like this, ‘Summer Madness’ Festival.
I don’t know if this is a worldwide pandemic or just where I live… but I have to say that I have some across two complete polar opposites of opinion and judgement of mothers with children; or just children too actually. I feel like I either get old women cooing over my little man or cantankerous men moaning behind me, whilst I struggle to get the pram down a set of steps, about “…all these women with pushchairs…” Is it that they have forgotten that they were children too once upon a time?
I have recently been finding it amazingly inspiring, uplifting and motivating spending time with fellow mamas and seeking out my own mama clan. After attending a wedding recently and reconnecting with a fellow rockin’ mama that was the photographer on the day, I had arranged to meet up and go on a mamas only night with her and her awesome mama friend. It was not only an amazing chance to fly solo and connect just us ladies, but also we were further inspired and touched by our choice of evening activity; cinema date to see ‘Bad Moms’.
I have to admit that this week has seen me quite emotional and therefore there are probably far… far more things I should have let go than I have done. I definitely feel like having at least the intention to let things go more and be mindful that if I don let more things go then in turn I will probably be blessed with a less stressful mind. Mamas are expected to deal with so much stress and just put a loving sweet smile on our faces; god forbid we act frazzled and exhausted!
So it has taken me a while to figure this out; this whole friendships after childbirth thing. I think I just always assumed that nothing would (or should) change with my circle of friends after I brought my little man into the world. I was wrong. It is a sad truth (bear with me… it gets better I promise!) that some people struggle to A. be around pregnant women and B. maintain friendships with women after they have children as they become ‘mothers’ and therefore cannot possibly go on nights out or have fun of any kind right?
Fellow rockin’ mamas unite! In my hope to inspire women to retain their self identity and passions after childbirth I am recruiting the help of other rockin’ mamas that prove you can mama it up without losing Y O U. Today I am sharing the life and experiences of an old friend that I recently crossed paths with once again and couldn’t help but notice how much of a rockin’ mama she is; Carly Stirling and her daughter Harper Rebel Josie Stirling.
I posted a while back about my epiphany to achieving serenity as a busy rockin’ mama and how I have started to adopt ‘let it go’ moments throughout my days to ease the building pressure that can erupt from the stresses of everyday life. Lets face it, we mamas are a busy bunch and if we can just take a breath, relax and ‘let it go’ from time to time I think it would ease our mental suffering! I have decided to share a few of my ‘let it go’ moments each week that have ended up becoming points of laughter instead the bubbling of a vocal volcano that could erupt at any given point!
As I have mentioned in previous *Musings* I have been known to become the occasional stress head. This was not always the case. Pre-Mamahood I was known to anyone who knew me as the ‘happy go lucky’ ‘hippy’ one; after I brought my little prince into the world everything that wouldn’t have bothered me previously suddenly seemed to be more of an annoyance to me.
I have always been a lover of baking, that is not to say that i could actually bake myself, quite the opposite. I was a terrible baker in the past, despite my purchasing of plentiful baking cookbooks and special silicone baking utensils. It was not until I became a mama that I weirdly became much more adept at cake-making, it was like some ‘mama instinct’ switch had suddenly turned on and I transformed into Martha Stewart
So wedding season is in full swing and all of our friends are getting married in very close proximity to another, including us soon! The first wedding was ‘child-free’ which gave me and the Mr a lovely day of ‘adult-ing’ without the worries of a little person in tow. The most recent wedding of two friends was more ‘bring your child or we will never forgive you’; the bride frequently looks after Jude and they have both become Auntie/Uncle archetypes. Seeing as my man was one of the grooms ‘best men’ and spent the night with his man clan I was faced with the prospect of getting me and the small prince ready and there in one piece solo!
I don’t know about you but I have found that after bringing my little man into the world I can become far more easily riled than my pre-baby, happy-go-lucky self. I have put this down to simply having more on my plate, or putting more on my plate, but are we making far more work for ourselves as mothers and creating unnecessary stress by placing the ideals of ourselves far too high?
Do we need to learn to occasionally ‘let go’?
So I have always maintained that when becoming a rocking’ mama it is super important to remain Y O U and keep on following your passions. My partner and I have always loved music; he is the guitarist of a local function bad and I have always had music as a huge part of my life (from birth my mother was playing me tapes of Kate Bush, Phil Collins Buddy Holly, make of that what you will!) When I fell pregnant it was no different for my little man, my partner bought me these ingenious speakers that stick onto your bump so that you can musically educate your bambinos in utero! Magic.